Buddhism

„The fact that man produces a concept "I" besides the totality of his mental and          emotional experiences or perceptions does not prove that there must be any specific existence behind such a concept. We are succumbing to illusions produced by our self-created language, without reaching a better understanding of anything. Most of so-called philosophy is due to this kind of fallacy.“
                                                                                    Albert Einstein

Having lived as a monk in a Japanese Zen monastery, I often experience that there are many misconceptions about Buddhism in Europe. This seems partly related to its usual classification as one of the world's religions. The Asian cultural accessories also obscure what it is about. It is simply a pragmatic, intelligent system to resolve man's basic dissatisfaction. It can be misleading to call Buddhism a religion, as it is something completely different from what we normally think of as religion within European culture, such as metaphysical dogmas or fixed beliefs. Even in modern science, with its still predominant materialistic world view, there are more metaphysical dogmas than in Buddhism, where the universe consists of shapes, colors, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings and thoughts. In the age of virtual reality, the existence of matter as a condition for experience turns out to be a dogmatic belief that cannot be substantiated by anything. The idea that there is a subject at the center of experience is also regarded as superstition in Buddhism.
Descartes' famous sentence - "I think, therefore I am" - is a logical fallacy, which becomes immediately clear when one says with the same logic: it is raining, therefore it is. Although Descartes already assumed his conclusion as a premise, this nonsense has been celebrated for centuries as a great philosophical achievement, as we have internalized the belief in an acting subject in such a way that the sentence feels logical, even though it is not. An acting subject can no more be logically deduced from the existence of thoughts than from the falling of drops of water.

If we imagine that we have just been born and do not yet know a single word, what is that before our eyes?
Is there really a perceiving subject?
And are there any problems?
Is there even such a thing as "time" or "space"?
The experience before the sensory impressions are interpreted by our concepts is sometimes called "reality" in Buddhism.
Over time, a baby begins to understand words. These are cultural inventions with which people try to describe the colorful world of forms around us. Apparently, the meaning of words is grounded in reality, but in fact, reality is devoid of any meaning. Meaning is projected into reality and covers it like a thick veil. Even the word "reality" is only an abstract idea. Nothing has a meaning of its own, it is only created by words. The meaning is in the eye of the beholder. Just like someone who looks at the cloudy sky and names the individual clouds. Nobody would believe that the clouds are truly called that, let alone make a drama out of what happens to the individual clouds. Anyone who has ever learned a language from a foreign language family will know the fascination of realizing how certain words cannot be translated because there is simply no word in the other language that even comes close to having a comparable meaning. 
There is a huge difference between the reality and the description, just as a map is not the same as the landscape and a menu is different from the flavor of the food.
The ecstasy and gratuitous happiness that you can admire in the eyes of small children is our natural state, which is lost over time because instead of reality, we increasingly perceive our own projections, and these increasingly involve judgement. The whole world is divided into positive and negative, and life becomes a never-ending battle. Without realizing it, we get caught up in the web of our own concepts. Above all, the idea of an "I" separate from the rest of the universe is the root of all problems. It's not that there are stray problems flying around in space, but they need an owner in order to exist. The universe is neither "good" nor "bad". It is simply what it is.
The problem is not the terms, which are undoubtedly useful when we want to order a coffee, for example. Problems and dissatisfaction arise because we take the descriptions we have learned in our culture for the truth, instead of seeing them as the fantasy they are. As soon as we open our eyes, instead of shapes and colors, we see a world made up of our own projections and, without even realizing it, we become victims of our own concrete world view. The good news is that it is possible to regain our natural state of nirvana by freeing ourselves from these projections, and dissolving the deep-seated habits of thought and conditioning that cloud our view of reality. This does not mean that we can no longer think straight, but that our thinking ceases to be a prison. When we are not slaves to our own thinking, and it does not get excessive attention, the mind becomes soft and flexible, and there is neither "contentment" nor "dissatisfaction". 
Around 2500 years ago, an Indian named Siddhartha Gautama „awoke“ from the dream world of his own projections and was later called by the Sanskrit word “Buddha”, which means „the awakened one“. Since then, there have been many other "Buddhas".

Some classic Buddhist terms have been proven useful over the last two millennia to delve a little deeper:

           Upaya                       

„What Dada is, not even the Dadaists know, only the head Dadaist - and he doesn't tell anyone!“
                                                                                          Johannes Baader

The Sanskrit word "upaya" means something like skillful or useful means. If all concepts and ideas are seen through as projections, there is no point in categorizing certain teachings as "right" or "wrong".
They can, however, be useful or helpful, for example, by pointing out that an idea or world view that someone clings to is perhaps not so set in stone after all, and showing a way in which it can be transcended. 
This is why the metaphor of medicine is used for Buddhist teachings, which is only good for curing a certain illness, while it is completely useless or even harmful for other illnesses. Once the illness has been cured, you have to stop taking the medicine, otherwise it will make you ill. Like a boat that has crossed a body of water, Buddhism is left behind when it has fulfilled its function. The teachings are not intended to replace old beliefs with new ones. If someone firmly believes in the Buddhist teachings, something has backfired. It's like someone swallowing the prescription for a medicine. The idea that all words are just projections is a delusion, but it can help to see through other delusions.
As the teachings, which are actually intended as a provisional aid, nevertheless tend to become dogmatic, there are entire libraries of Buddhist writings in which other Buddhist teachings are negated, refuted and cursed until even the last trace of an idea has been deconstructed. A famous Chinese monk even said that he would have beaten the Buddha to death and thrown him to the dogs.
In the end, you come out the other side, and a rose is a rose because it is not a rose - or something like that.
Studying the scriptures as a purely intellectual pursuit is pointless. It's like going into a restaurant, reading the menu and then leaving. It's not about understanding anything, it's about actually tasting it for yourself. The entire Buddhist teaching consists only of provisional means that are useful and helpful or not, depending on the situation.


 Dukkha

„Life is a bitch, and then you die.“


"Dukkha" is traditionally translated as "suffering", but this is only roughly accurate. It encompasses every form of discomfort, stress, dissatisfaction, longing, frustration, fear, illness, death - basically everything we don't want to have.
When you learn that dukkha can also be happiness and contentment, it becomes clear that the term is not so easy to translate. The idea behind this is that any relative happiness that depends on momentary circumstances is not sustainable and will inevitably turn into its opposite again. Moreover, this kind of dependent happiness always contains a subtle fear of the certain end of the circumstances in question.
Surprisingly, it makes no difference to the degree of our contentment or dissatisfaction whether we are sitting on a luxury yacht or on a nail board, although we intuitively judge it quite differently.
Sometimes Buddhism is seen as pessimistic because of its emphasis on "suffering", but it is only about seeing the situation realistically, recognizing the cause and then finding a solution. In contrast, the majority of modern Western culture consists of repressing the situation. However, running away from your own feelings, loneliness, boredom and fear of death through consumption, entertainment, alcohol, work or even ‘spirituality’ ultimately doesn't work.


 Avidya

„The day you stop racing, is the day you win the race.“ 
                                                                                                          Bob Marley

"Avidya" is seen as the cause of dukkha and is traditionally translated as "ignorance" or "delusion". Here, too, there is a problem with the translation: "ignorance" here does not mean that we do not know something. On the contrary, it is the false belief or illusion that we know something. „Delusion“ is more appropriate, namely the delusion to believe your own thoughts, or the misunderstanding of taking the distinctions and definitions created by one's own mind for reality. What is missing is not any additional knowledge, but the wisdom to recognize all our accumulated knowledge as relative and ultimately as self-deception. Our knowledge may be a practical tool, but it is not the truth. Behind every unhappiness and dissatisfaction there is an idea, at least the idea that there is an "I", and usually a bunch of other madness. The cause of our misery never lies in external circumstances, although our entire culture constantly tells us so, but always within ourselves. 
"Heaven" and "hell" are products of our own minds.

Delusion creates desires and aversions, love and hate. 
After we have divided the universe into different categories by means of our imaginative inventions, these are assessed and categorized into two camps: The ones we want and the others we don't want, good and bad, plus and minus. Then we run like donkeys after a carrot and try to get the plus side and get rid of the minus side. What I have, I don't want, and what I want, I can't get. And even if we have managed to get rid of the entire minus half of the universe, we immediately split the remaining plus half into two halves again and continue to run on the hamster wheel. Especially within ourselves, we constantly find feelings and thoughts that we like, and those others - actually absurd when one part of us observes and evaluates another part of us. Our ego tells us that we have to achieve this or that, and without pause, we search for the Holy Grail behind the seven mountains, not realizing that we are holding it in our hands. 
In the Zen monastery, of all places, I experienced for the first time in my life what it means to be truly happy for no reason, even though the external circumstances are rather unpleasant, with chilblains in winter and hard labor in the summer heat.
Of course, recognizing our own evaluations as projections does not mean that "everything doesn't matter", which is just another insane idea. On the contrary: ethical behavior only really becomes possible and is the natural result when we stop chasing our supposed advantage and forcing our "truth" on others.


 Sunyata

 „The silencing of all ideas and the end of the projection of concepts onto reality is peace. The Buddha did not teach anything.“
                                                                                     Nagarjuna

The Münchhausen trilemma states that we cannot ultimately establish anything, as every attempt to ultimately establish something ends in either a logical circular argument, an infinite regress or a dogmatization. But not only that, even the attempt to define a single word also ends in a circular argument or an infinite regress. In order to be able to define something, we need other terms, which also have to be defined first, and so on. All our thinking is built entirely on sand, without even a trace of a solid foundation.
"Sunyata" is usually translated as "emptiness,“ and here again the translation is problematic. What is meant is a lack of substance in the sense that there is no fixed permanent point in a universe in which everything changes. Just like waves in the sea, there is nothing that has its own essence or a permanent core, including ourselves. This does not mean that anything does not exist, but only that nothing can be defined, delimited or separated and flows through our fingers when we want to grasp it, as everything can only be defined relatively and in interdependence with something else. While everything flows and turns, vibrates, wobbles and shines, we construct small squares and screw handles onto them. "To be or not to be" are intellectual ideas that only gain meaning through their opposition. Each word draws an artificial dividing line in the sand, creating one side and another. In a universe where everything changes every nanosecond, it is only our abstract concepts that give us the deceptive feeling that something remains. 
Nagarjuna, who is responsible for the spread of the concept of "emptiness" in Asia, was an Indian monk from the second century and is regarded as the most important figure in Mahayana Buddhism alongside the historical Buddha. He logically refuted all the commonplace, philosophical and Buddhist views of his time and refused to put forward a thesis himself. He regarded the concept of emptiness, which he coined and frequently used, only as a means of communication and expressly warned against understanding it as a theory in its own right. Even "emptiness" has no substance and is not an ultimate truth. It is itself empty.
His logical and philosophical treatises were not an end in themselves but were aimed at liberating people from their self-induced dissatisfaction.
In Tibetan traditions, it is common practice to logically examine one's own basic convictions. What exactly is it that we call "I"? We say that we have a body and a mind. So is the "I" somewhere outside the body and mind? Where is that supposed to be? Or are we body and mind? But what exactly? Are we the individual parts? The thoughts, feelings, heart and brain? Which part exactly is what we call "I" and which is not? We can receive the heart of someone else, but what would happen with a brain transplant? Where is the core of our being that really constitutes the "I"? If we change our faith, gender and name, are we still the same "I"? Apart from the name, an old man has nothing to do physically or mentally with the baby he once was. All the components have been completely replaced. Is the "I" then a different one than before? And when did it become a different one? Is there really a "thinker" that exists outside and independently of thoughts, and if so, what is it, and where is it?
If you seriously and not just superficially, on an intellectual level, deal with such questions for a while and the familiar belief construct in which you have established yourself floats away, a feeling of insecurity and disorientation can arise that can even be accompanied by physical symptoms. Not being able to hold on to anything can feel like a free fall without a parachute. Fortunately, there is no solid ground below, and at some point, the flight becomes pleasant and liberating. Serious doubts about the existence of an ‘I’ can trigger fears. Although it is only the illusory ego that is at stake, it resists with all its tricks and clings convulsively to the steering wheel. The fear of losing control is based on the crazy assumption that there are two ‘I's’, one of which controls the other. 
Some projections are buried so deeply in our subconscious that we don't even suspect they exist. Just like someone who has worn green glasses all their life has no idea that there are other colors. Suddenly taking off the glasses is like standing on the edge of a hundred meter high cliff and taking a step forward.

When all projections disappear, that is also the end of dukkha.


 Dhyana


 „Man is unhappy because he doesn't know that he is happy. That's the only reason. That's all! Whoever recognises this will at once be happy, that same moment.“
                                                                                                                               Fyodor Dostojewski

The Sanskrit word "Dhyana" gave rise to the Chinese "Chan" and later the Japanese "Zen" and is usually translated as "meditation". However, in the Zen monastery where I lived, the idea of meditation was rejected if it meant techniques aimed at achieving special states of consciousness. Instead, we practiced "sitting". Several times a year, we spent a week sitting together in silence in front of a wall. And otherwise, we worked.
It is not necessary to change your usual way of life and become a Buddhist, you can just stay seated on your office chair or your luxury yacht or your nail board. You don't need incense sticks, mandalas, bodhisattva statues or Japanese robes. 
It is actually enough to see through one's own world of thoughts and the existence of an "I" as an illusion and from then on live happily and later die in peace, but unfortunately this does not work for most people or ends in further self-deception. Therefore, thousands of makeshift techniques have emerged over time, but a large collection of different practices and rituals is not needed. 
A Chinese monk looked in the mirror every morning and asked himself, "Master, are you awake?" Then he admonished himself: "Don't be fooled!" That was his only practice. 
Or there is the recommendation to simply spend the day in the presence of the nameless.
A math teacher once spent his summer holidays with us in the monastery, and the only instruction he was given was to sit like an idiot. After a few weeks, he begged for some additional advice, but his request was refused. 
In Soto Zen, often no special technique is used at all, but the practice simply consists of leaving everything exactly as it is, throwing away one's "I" and all ideas, including and especially all Buddhist ideas, and no longer trying to achieve or be anything else. You simply try to completely be everything you do and everything that happens - seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling, feeling and thinking, whether sitting, standing, walking or lying down.
If you find this difficult, you can also sit quietly and concentrate on your breathing or something else. Of course, you should not try to concentrate on something other than what you are doing if it requires your attention. However, at the bus stop, while walking or sunbathing, in the waiting room or on the plane, you can use the time to concentrate on your breathing or the sound of wind or rain or traffic noise or even just the tip of your nose. At work, you can just do your work as well as you can. There's never a moment in life when you can't wholeheartedly do whatever you are doing, even when you're arguing with your neighbor.
You should be careful not to misuse practice for self-optimization or as a means to an end. And let go of the idea that you need to suppress your own thinking. Everything there is to achieve is already there. We already live in the "here and now" and have never done anything else. There is no nirvana somewhere behind the clouds. If we can't cope with what we have today, we are guaranteed to be no better off tomorrow.
The point is to eliminate the distance between yourself and everything else until you are so merged with it that there is no "I" left. All other projections then dissolve along with it.
The question „Who am I" is also good to focus on throughout the day, as is any other question that is close to your heart.
It's less a matter of the best technique but rather a question of motivation and determination. Everyone must know for themselves whether they want to sit quietly for 5 minutes a day, or whether they can think of nothing else until they have resolved the matter of life and death. 
Meister Eckhart, Rumi and some others had no one to tell them what to do and left the religious and other dogmas of their respective cultures far behind on their own. When Meister Eckhart says that the eye with which he sees God and the eye with which God sees him are the same eye, then he has truly freed himself from learned concepts and has become his own master.
Anyone who sees through the pointlessness of superficial comforts and philosophical or political bickering, has questions and is seriously searching is already practicing Buddhism. Those who have an answer to everything do not.
If you can't believe that you will ever become a "Buddha", when in fact that is what you are, don't worry. Just start off getting yourself out of the worst misery. In the end, we can't miss becoming what we originally are.
Every practice is just a crutch that must eventually become superfluous. Buddhist practice must go so far that there is no longer anyone practicing, and all ideas of "practicing" or "not practicing" are forgotten. When you believe that you have arrived or awakened, the idea of a subject is still hidden within that. „Buddha“ is a projection. Every borrowed Buddhist idea must be returned. 

Dirk Shodo Aleksic




Some recommended literature:

  • Blofeld, John. The Zen Teaching Of Huang Po. New York: Grove Press, 1994
  • Cleary, Christopher. Swampland Flowers: The Letters And Lectures Of Zen Master Ta Hui. New York: Grove Press, 1977
  • Cleary, Thomas. Zen Essence, The Science Of Freedom. Boston: Shambala, 2000
  • Cleary, Thomas & J. C. The Blue Cliff Record. Boston: Shambala, 2005
  • Cleary, Thomas & J. C. Zen Letters, Teachings Of Yuanwu. Boston: Shambala, 1995
  • Harada, Sekkei. The Essence Of Zen, translated by Daigaku Rumme. Boston: Wisdom Publications, 2008
  • Harada, Sekkei. Unfathomable Depths, translated by Daigaku Rumme and Heiko Narrog. Boston: Wisdom Publications, 2014
  • Inoue, Gien. A Blueprint Of Enlightenment, translated by Daigaku Rumme and Keiko Ohmae. Temple Ground Press, 2020
  • Jones, Richard H. Nagarjuna, Buddhism's Most Important Philosopher. New York: Jackson Square Books, 2018
  • Price, A. F. & Wong Mou-Lam. The Diamond Sutra And The Sutra Of Hui-Neng. Boston: Shambala, 1990
  • Red Pine. The Lankavatara Sutra, Translation And Commentary. Berkeley: Counterpoint, 2012
  • Soseki, Muso. Dream Conversations, translated by Thomas Cleary. Boston: Shambala, 1994
  • Thurman, Robert A. F. The Holy Teaching Of Vimalakirti. Pennsylvania State University Press, 1976
  • Waddell, Norman. The Essential Teachings Of Zen Master Hakuin. Boston: Shambala, 1994
  • Waddell, Norman. Wild Ivy, The Spiritual Autobiography Of Zen Master Hakuin. Boston: Shambala, 2001
  • Watson, Burton. The Zen Teachings Of Master Lin-Chi. New York: Columbia University Press, 1999





The following are excerpts from my translations of speeches by Sekkei Harada, late abbot of Hosshinji, the Soto Zen monastery in Japan where I lived as a monk and gardener:

 

Buddhism is not a matter of understanding some theories, it is about your problems. Unavoidably, it is necessary to listen to the Buddha’s teaching first. But then, how do you know if the teaching is true or false? Why is the teaching of impermanence true? This must really become your question. You think there is no mistake about the teaching, but why is there no mistake about it?  
Why is it, that the ancient masters started to practice and then finally were able to solve it for themselves?  
Because at first they had doubts.  
It is strange if you just end up to believe in the teaching. To earnestly practice and make it your own is essential.  
 

-------


Where have you been, before your father and mother were born? Or, in other words, when did the self come into existence and why? Where did it come from? When did it become "Peter" or "Mary"? Even if you ask yourself these questions, you don't know. You don't even know the day you are born by yourself. You have heard it from somebody else. Everything you know, without exception, you have learned from others. There isn't even one thought that you have created only by yourself. Being brought up by mankind, you think that there is something called "I", as you have been told. You believe that this thing called "I" exists apart from thought and knowledge. "I am born on that day, and my name is Peter." You completely take this for granted. But if you really think about it, there isn't even a single thing that you know for yourself. Between the "me" that you have learned from others to be, and the self that you really are, there will always be conflict. If you don't become aware of this, you will never be able to escape your fixed habits of thought. 
Unless the true self, that has nothing to do with any acquired knowledge, really becomes your own, unless you can really say for yourself, "this is it", no matter how perfectly you understand some theory, it will only be something you have learned from others. 
To really forget the self means that "good" and "bad", "high" and "low", "love" and "hate" completely disappear. 
There isn't even the smallest difference between delusion and enlightenment.  
To say it radically, it is ridiculous to look for something called "enlightenment".  
There is nothing that can be compared. If you don't realize for yourself, that there is a difference between your concepts and reality, no matter what kind of splendid talk you hear, you will never reach the final point. 
Immediately you think: "Is there a final point?" 
Everything is the final point. To this degree, everything is only what it is. Shakyamuni explained this in different ways, for example as "cause and effect". He gave all those explanations, but can we really say, something is a "cause" or "effect"? 
Because he gave such explanations, you think that there is something called "cause" and "effect". You can't help it. But after all, you once have to realize your original condition, you have to become aware of what you originally are. Each of you, as you are, is already a Buddha, but you just can't perceive yourself as something else than what you have been told. The more teachings you hear, the more confused you become. If there is understanding, there is also not understanding. As the other side of understanding, not understanding unavoidably appears. 
You can definitely become aware of your original nature, if you make effort to do each thing single-mindedly. Single-mindedly eat, single-mindedly walk, single-mindedly sit, single-mindedly work. Please earnestly endeavor like this. 

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Seeing one’s own true nature just means to see that we consist of the four elements - earth, water, fire, and wind. You could replace it with more modern terms, but in traditional Buddhism the universe is considered to be made of earth, water, fire, and wind. That’s your own nature. Our true nature is just these elements. It’s maybe easy to believe that for somebody who has become empty or who has entered nirvana, everything is completely clear or so. But, using the words of Nanyue, it is just “everyday mind is the way”. Our everyday mind - that is to hate something, to like something else, to suffer - all kinds of emotions - all that is within “everyday mind”. Whatever thought, emotion or consciousness - it is all everyday mind. All of that is the Way of Buddha. But the more you practice, the more you start thinking that enlightenment is like this or Zen is like that. You become an expert knowing all those words of the old masters that you remember. That is not the real thing. “Enlightenment” is just an explanation or description within human thinking. In fact, everyday mind, being completely entangled and confused, is just as it is what is called enlightenment or nirvana.  

-------

 
The most important thing in Zen practice is to put the mind in order. Since ancient times people have really devoted themselves to Zen and there are also people here, who have made great effort for many years. 
Why is it so difficult to put the mind in order? It is because the mind is deceived by itself. The mind constantly changes and deceives itself. You are deceived by your own thoughts, believing whatever you think, to be true or real. 
What does it mean, to put the mind in order? 
It means to leave everything as it is, to completely entrust yourself to everything. Even though this is simple, somewhere the mind loves itself and can't be satisfied with just flowing along. 
It means to stop controlling your thoughts. To really do this, is difficult. It means to leave thoughts as they are. Entrust yourself to the thoughts that come and go. Really become one with your breathing, or whatever you are intently looking at, during this period of Zazen.  
Everything is Buddha. As I keep saying, we are all diamonds. Nobody is a glass bead. Please really believe this and then sit, and put the mind in order. 
I sometimes hear people saying, that here in this monastery the monks and nuns have a bad sitting posture or something like this, but the only problem really is, whether the mind is in order or not. That is, whether you can entrust yourself to everything, leaving everything as it is, or not. 

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 Once, after Shakyamuni had climbed onto the lecturing seat, one of his disciples said: “Carefully watch the king of the teaching. The teaching of the king of the teaching is this.” Shakyamuni came down again and the sermon was finished.  This means that whatever thought comes up - it is the teaching of Shakyamuni. All the different kinds of thought that come and go - it’s all Zen. It means you must not look for Zen outside. Everything is done. It’s all finished here. Maybe you think: “I have to do this.” Or: “My practice is not good enough.” Including everything, your condition right now, whatever you do, it’s all Zen. It’s all the teaching of the king of the teaching. So stop using Zen practice as a means or a method to try to get or understand something. You are already completely stuffed with it. You are already totally filled up with it. But unfortunately, you don’t clearly see it for yourself. And therefore you keep thinking that Zen is somewhere else. Stop creating this delusion. I would like you to understand deeply, that at all times, whatever you do, it is the teaching of Shakyamuni Buddha.  
“Carefully watch the king of the teaching. The teaching of the king of the teaching is this.” So please always completely become the condition you are in now.

-------

 
It is definitely possible that all dualistic viewpoints like cold and hot, suffering and ease completely disappear. There is such a world. I say there is such a world, but actually, you are already always within that world. You just don’t become aware of it. You don’t realize it. That’s all. You already have that treasure. Unfortunately, you just don’t notice for yourself, that it is the final point of Buddhism, also called emptiness.

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Deshan Xuanjian was a Buddhist scholar in ancient China who had written many books about the Diamond Sutra. One day in a tea house, an old lady serving him a snack asked him: "The Diamond Sutra says: 'The past mind can not be grasped. The present mind can not be grasped. The future mind can not be grasped.' With what mind are you going to eat this?" Of course, the famous scholar knew this quote very well, but he could not even answer one word. He was dumbfounded and so embarrassed, that he started sweating. This became a big problem for him, realizing that all of his studies were useless in the end. He decided to become a monk, and later became an outstanding Zen master.  
His teaching was this: "30 blows if you speak. 30 blows if you don't." For example, he would ask you: "What is the Buddhist teaching?" As soon as you opened your mouth, he would hit you with a stick. Bang. Bang. If you kept your mouth shut, he would hit you just the same.  

Buddhism does not exist in this monastery. If I say, it does not exist, it means that it is everything. 
Everything is Zen. Many people mistakenly think, they can't practice Zen without sitting on a cushion. We are having a retreat now, sitting on a cushion to be able to really concentrate for a couple of days, but the Zen while eating or while walking or while doing other things is of utmost importance. 
A lay disciple of Ida Toin awakened to his true nature one day standing in a commuter train. The chance for this to happen is everywhere. It is not a matter of finding the right conditions. Whatever condition you meet, it is Zen as it is. The cause is already the result. To this degree, there is no next thing in our daily life. It is all the essence of Zen. Some kind of special Zen does not exist. The only problem is, if you can really accept your condition as it is now. 
What I would like you to do, is to always be aware of a question. Any question is fine. You have all kinds of different problems. I would like you to use them and hang on to them, always being conscious of a problem. In Zen terminology, this is called a "koan". It means to always be conscious of a question while you live your daily life. There is no need for the classical koans of the ancient masters. Just use your own personal problem.  
Some of you concentrate on a koan at certain times, like when you are sitting, but as soon as you stand up, it is completely gone. To believe that Zen means to clean up thoughts is a terrible misunderstanding. I would like you to always be aware of a question without forgetting it. Of course, we are now sitting on a cushion all day, but to think that Zen only happens when you are sitting on a cushion, is far away from it. 
"The past mind can not be grasped. The present mind can not be grasped. The future mind can not be grasped." 
What is the mind?  Who created past, present and future? I would like you to investigate this quotation from the Diamond Sutra: 
"The past mind can not be grasped. The present mind can not be grasped. The future mind can not be grasped." 
Thank You.